the itch you can't scratch

have you ever felt that? is it not one of the worst experiences ever?!


now, imagine that same feeling... but the 'itch' is in your mind... and for the life of you it just can't be 'scratched' because you can't quite locate the source.


that's what i've been dealing with the past couple of months. apparently it's a side effect of the new medication i'm on. the exact label for this side effect: memory loss.


i just call it the itch.


i'll be thinking about something, writing a paper for school, talking to someone, or even giving an answer in class or church and suddenly ___________________________


nothing.

seriously, people.


crickets can be heard, for there is absolutely nothing else present.


at times i find it aggravating to spend so much time searching endlessly for a word that, once i find {whether that be five minutes, five hours, or even five days later}, seems so inconsequential. however, i usually find the humor in the situation.


the other day i joined in a game with some friends --- one of those guessing-type games where there are categories and answers... you know the type. at one point, a player named the category and i could picture in my mind the exact movie that would be the perfect answer to win! the name of the movie? ... 


ahhh! it eluded me! and for the rest of the night the only thing i could think about was this 'perfect' movie and its ever-elusive name. after everyone else went home, my friend tried to help me 'scratch the itch' by having me explain details about the movie. my memory must have been growing hazier by the hour because i described it like this:

the main characters are men

these same men play all the different characters in the movie

it's a classic, not old classic, but everyone knows this movie

i think the movie starts with an "m"

the men are like troubadours or something

the men go on adventures, play instruments, and sing songs

can you guess what movie i was trying to think of?

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

yep, it took approximately four hours to finally remember the name of that stinkin' movie. hours, people. multiple hours of my life. oh gosh, i laughed so hard at that one.


and this is a regular occurrence. hours trying to remember words or important things or information i've learned and really, really need to remember for a quiz or test {or to simply show off how incredibly intelligent i am :) haha...}.


so why suffer such horrible itches?


because this medication is helping me with my fibromyalgia and it's actually doing a good job! i'm seeing results and able to function through the pain better than before. hopefully my mind will adjust? maybe, maybe not.


but for now... i don't mind being a little senile.

tata for now! --- if i remember to write!

just kidding. i think.