a safe place

i am no stranger to uncomfortable - or even painful - feelings. not that i claim to have lived an excruciatingly hard life. i merely state that because it is required of human nature to taste the bitter to know the sweet, i am deeply familiar with the bitterness the world can bring.

while experiencing the unpleasantries of life, there is nothing more soothing than a safe place. do you have one? you know, somewhere there is no danger, no hate, no added hurt or pain? somewhere to go when you are in pain? a place where you find comfort and strength to keep going.

each person's safe place may be different ~ wrapped in mother's arms, head resting on a dear friend's shoulder, surrounded by crowds or alone with only thoughts for company, in a car, under the covers in bed, in a beautiful garden of flowers, on a coastal beach, curled in fetal position clutching a blanket. regardless where or what one's safe place is, we go there in our times of grief, stress, heartache, and pain.

there are two hymns in the lds hymnbook that touch my heart and soul, bringing a peace and understanding that surpass any earthly remedy with its power {the corresponding scriptures are true gems ~ look them up}. i remember the first time i ever heard hymn no. 144 ~ practicing as a family to sing it for my uncle ron's funeral after his premature death. because both hymns have special meaning, i included some of my favorite phrases:

no. 129 : where can i turn for peace

no. 144 : secret prayer

where is my solace when other sources cease to make me whole? searching my soul, in my need to know, where can i run? where is the quiet hand to calm my anguish? who can understand? He, only One. He answers privately, reaches my reaching. in my gethsemane, Savior and friend. constant He is and kind, love without end.

sailing on life's stormy sea, amid billows of despair, {it is} solace to my soul to know God hears my secret prayer. when thorns are strewn along my path, my Savior to my aid will come if sought in secret prayer. may my heart be turned to pray in secret day by day. that this boon to mortals given may unite my soul with heaven.

interestingly enough, "boon" means a benefit bestowed upon request. trials, blessings, all the experiences we asked for before we came to earth are ultimately granted in this life in the attempt to reunite our souls with our Father who sent us here and His Son who provided a way for us.

as this month draws to a close, i desire to express my gratitude for the safe place Jesus Christ created for us in His love.

i am grateful for the comfort brought by the Holy Ghost.

twenty-two

that is how many years it has been since that snowy thanksgiving afternoon - promptly around two pm - when i was born. that is how i received my family nicknames "thanksgiving turkey". every so often {with varying gaps of five, six, and eleven years}, my birthday lands on thanksgiving day. in fact, it will be another six years before i have another thanksgiving birthday.

since it is fairly rare that my birthday is on the holiday of my birth, i have taken this to be a sign. in addition, my lucky number is two -- and the more twos there are, the luckier it is. because i am turning twenty-two on this thanksgiving day, i believe this is a sign that it will be the best year of my life {or at least thus far}.

having a birthday so near to such a big holiday has its pros and cons, as i am sure you can imagine. it often seems to be overlooked, for christmas is drawing near and money is tight, etc. this year, however, my parents were fabulous at making my birthday just as special as thanksgiving. surrounded by love with so many sweet family members made today memorable and peaceful.


today has reminded me that though many days may appear dark, dreary, lonesome, or difficult... no matter what, i have people who love me.

and that's really all that matters.

long time gone

i cannot believe it has been over a month since my last post! life got crazy and has not let-up until now. so, what has kept me so busy?

of course school, which is going alright. it is at this time of the semester that i just pray for a grade that passes and divvy up my time between the things that matter most.

also my church calling: second counselor in the relief society presidency of my new singles student ward where my dad is in the bishopric. it is still such a new experience for me, but i have very much enjoyed it. this is where the majority of my time somehow slips away. i think this is mostly because i would rather spend my time doing things for the wonderful sisters in my ward than boring homework. so far, so great.

finally, trying to be more social than i have been in a year and a half -- and it is a lot of work! much easier are the many nights spent with my sweet dog Precious, watching television or movies. however, spending more time with other human beings has been much more fulfilling.

so there you have it -- the reasons i have been absent for such a long while from the blogging world. i missed it, i missed you, and ... i sure hope you missed me.

life's lemons into lemonade

i often refer to 'tender mercies' of the Lord and tonight was no different.

my car has been giving me trouble for quite some time now. i've had my mechanic look at it several times, still he can't find anything wrong with it. the is something wrong, however, when your car's battery dies in the middle of a busy road for no apparent reason.

then along comes a kind-hearted stranger asking if they can help in any way. it's not a stranger, though, it's a well-known and cherished voice. it was the voice of the beautiful lady in the left of the picture with my sister sundy.

it is through sundy that i met chelsey. i remember meeting chelsey back when they had just met in high school. i admired their loving, supporting relationship and always believed theirs exemplified what it meant to be a true fried. i love chels with all my heart, more than she probably even knows or could ever understand.

on a patience-trying night there is only one voice that could have made all frustrations flee, and there she was. this angel on earth was there for me {again} even when she didn't know who it was who needed her help. i don't even know how she was able to make pushing a huge car all by ourselves something fun, but she did. she's amazing.

hers are the hands that took my lemons and made them sweet enough to drink.

love you chels<3

mission impossible

this fall in school i'm taking a course entitled "modifying health behaviors" and guess what the semester-long project we all have to complete is! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

if you guessed "a behavior change project" you win a prize! {not really, but yay! for you}

i don't even think it is possible to pinpoint which part of this monster is worse! first i thought it might be the pure fact that i had to choose the behavior! how could i narrow it down to just one?! terrifying, right?

then i thought the worst part of the project was going to be writing the description of the problem, or the behavioral, medical, and physical assessments. no, the worst part is that i actually have to change this behavior.

you may be wondering what behavior i ended up choosing to modify.

~ ~ ~ sleep ~ ~ ~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i've had a problem with healthy sleep schedules since elementary school. and no, i promise i am not exaggerating in the slightest. just ask my dad if he can remember a time when i wasn't late or absent from school because he couldn't get me out of bed. yeah, these instances were few and far between.

here is my planned course of action:

{approximately 60 minutes}
-clean-up any messes in bedroom and make bed [ 10 minutes ]
-change into pajamas and put clothes in hamper [ 5 minutes ]
-prepare herbal tea and take medications [ 15 minutes ]
-wash face and brush teeth [ 5 minutes ]
-journal / write in ‘worry book’ [ 15 minutes ]
-turn on woodlands music album and practice yoga stretches/meditation [ 10 minutes ]
-turn off lights and practice progressive-relaxation until asleep

and guess what! tonight is the night i'm supposed to start doing the routine. i'm going to slowly work myself up to starting the routine at 9pm so that i'll be in bed by 10pm. yeah ... i know ~ wishful thinking.

so here goes nothing!

{or rather: hopefully something!}